Monday, March 24, 2008

Ignorance is bliss?


Gored gored sounds... well just like it sounds:) the only raw meat I ever had was horse meat and that was delicious. So I believe you about it being tasty haha.

So I called my friend's big sister up, coz she's been on my mind for some reason, n met up with her. She's so fuckin awesome!!! I was telling her about how I'm meeting lesbians online, and found out about this event they have every month called Ladykiller. N she was like, "E? Do you have to be a lesbian to get in??" No, it's just like girl party but really no males allowed even if ur gay. They have pole dancers, and performers, and different djs for every hour. And then she said, "OH!! That sounds interesting! I wanna go." lol so, you might be hearing about a Japanese girl party soon;) hehe

I've been making a few lesbian contacts via the internet. They get together to have parties every now and then, and they welcome new comers who come alone lol. It's more than I expected!!! I've never met someone who I met online in person, except for the Temple Law student lol, so I don't know how to feel about it. It just sounds like lots of lesbians gettin together to have fun so that's cool:)

I also met a couple of friends from high school yesterday. It was like laughing none stop!! and then on my way home, I notice I had like 12 unread text from R... I had just told her that morning that I had fucked someone else while we were together because she asked. I never meant to use the truth to hurt anyone. She sounded really pissed like "why would you do that to me? what did i do to you? u ruin me. u make me wanna die. ur a liar. deceitful, destructive, immature, and have insecurities that will never go away." WOw those are strong words. Ok, that's ok. She can say whatever and it's no going to change anything...just made me feel bad a little but I could only say "ok." Then she wanted to know who. But I don't think it's relevant anymore. Whatever happened is between me and them... why should I out them? Plus we are not together anymore, and I really don't feel the need. It was just really ugly with her calling me names n being pure mean. I just said "leave me alone and be happy w ur new woman."

After I said bye to my friends, started reading all the texts. It was like, "tell me who. i tell u who i fucked." "it's gna hurt u. can u handle?" and she started naming guys that she fucked and a lil details too. And Bito, that was the happiest I have ever felt since I've been with her. You have no idea! The feeling of, I was right lifted me and I felt so light. I was sad that she really wanted to hurt me by telling me the things she's been hiding from me. It's unfortunate that you actually try to hurt someone's feeling like that... I was really unimpressed. But I was so thankful. And all this time I've felt pain... everything just vanished. The vision is, clouds parting and it's a clear blue sky!!! She said, "You see not knowing somethings makes us happier. ignorance is bliss or sloth?" I totally disagreed. Yes I thought ignorance was bliss... but I have made a huge discovery about myself:) So I just wanted to share w u this valuable experience I had yesterday.

I apologize for all the troubles I have caused you, and you were always there for me. Hey man, gta have love for people... we are so not perfect.

On that note, gotta get ready. I'm gna visit the insurance people at their office remember?

Sending lots of love and smile:)


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